Diefenbunker

Oh, Christ on a cracker. What will become of us?

Got my latest installment of vegetables. It included the above (giant paperclip included for scale). My first thought when I took them out of the container was:

mystery veg Batman sound clips

I guess I could look up what the hell these are but seriously, who gives a shit. I'll cut into one and if there are seeds inside like a pumpkin, I'll roast it. If it's more like a zucchini then I'll fry the crap out of it, which is really my preferred method of all food preparation save cereal. I suppose I could try and carve a Tom Selleck into one, but should I be aiming so high, so soon? What I need is a pumpkin carving coach.

[Update: Michel knew what the mystery vegetables were, *of course*. Delicata Squash, a winter variety known for its sweet-potato-like ways. So I'll roast them.]

Visit from my parental was pretty fun! Mostly we were caught up in the made-for-TV special that is my sister's life. As my mother flew into the 'twa, Sis (back from her 2 month ashram&ablution sojourn in Rishikesh, India) was enroute to Campbell River, British Columbia, driving her truck through blizzarding mountain passes and trying to decide about Her Future. Door #1: break up with longterm boyfriend James and take a job in India that has been offered to her; Door #2: propose to James, move to Campbell River. Those of you who want her to negotiate a Door #3 which allows her to keep the boy and the job are out of luck: Pandiji (the job offerer -- I don't know his real name, that's want people call him) will only agree to her working in India if she is married or single, no in-betweens, and James steadfastly refuses to go to India. The Shirley quote that had my jaw hitting the floor? "I would rather see her in India than married to James." Did not see that one coming. So both my mother and I are wanting her to choose India, albeit for different reasons. Why do my parents hate James so much? What will she choose? Will I get to visit her in India? All these questions remain unanswered because she is stalling for time by visiting other friends in BC as she gradually makes her way to the River of Campbell. Stay tuned.

In between phone calls from sister, we toured the locale, sampled some Serious Cheese, some lobster poutine, bought some items at Roots (yes, I know they have Roots stores in Calgary, but that's what she wanted to do) and went to the BEST MUSEUM EVAH.

I give you: DIEFENBUNKER!!! It is an early 1960s era four-storey government collosus, built underground in the middle of nowhere Ontario (Carp) to ensure that 535 members of the Canadian government would survive a Cold War nuclear attack -- for 30 days. There's a bank vault to house all of Canada's gold (very important to hoard precious metal in the event of a nuclear holocaust because it is so effing useful), a Situation Room where the leaders of my country could shit themselves in terror and confinement discuss The Situation, a CBC area so the national radio service could broadcast bullshit calming messages of reassurance to the exposed crispy Canadian plebs, and female quarters to ensure that the Canadian race would be perpetuated by the handful of women-secretaries allowed into the building. Okay, that part about the Canadian race wasn't in the brochure - but there are female's quarters. The bunker-museum is named after the Prime Minister who commissioned it, John G. Diefenbaker and it cost an unknown amount of CDN $ but estimates range from between 22 to 50 million. It's the creepiest place I've ever been, I totally loved it. Sadly, no pictures allowed so none posted here.

Wanna come to Ottawa now?!