Friends, as warm winds blow maniacally over the 'Twa hinterland, I can only announce that I am feeling très magnifique. C'est vrai, a real Francophone would probably never say that. But I am not a real Francophone! It is a great day. E will be here in 29 hrs, I'm done teaching for the week, and for some reason I have not begun stressing about next week! Probably because it will be awesome because E will be here the WHOLE TIME because it is her Spring Break. *I am SO excited!*
The week of Feb 26 ignited a hell storm of hell but I lived through it and have come out the other side. The feelings of euphoria won't go away. I gave a paper to some Jane Austen fans that did not disgrace me and then I gave a paper to my dept that did not disgrace me. I have dodged bullets! My tarot keeps warning me that more bullets await but I just can't believe it.
I have to clean the house like a madwoman today AND give Monty the spa treatment: mani/pedi, deep cleansing and conditioning, ear-and-long-sick-weenus-hair removal, teeth-brushing, coat-brushing, heart worm pill, and perhaps a snack (his favourite treat flavour = Oral Care). He's going to effing hate me. But he's a dog - he'll forget, somewhere around dinner time, I imagine.
Things that won't go away: my Grade 5 teacher. No, I didn't have the coming out talk with her and perhaps I should but I really enjoy ignoring these things and hoping that they will go away. Also, there doesn't seem to be a good moment and I'm a bad emailer anyway.
February 25Carol
Hi D, I don't want to repeat myself, so I'm going to ask you if I ever told you the story of when I was teaching you, and at the end of the school day, when I would have been tired, something funny came out of my mouth, and I still remember Jason sucking in his cheeks and trying so hard not to laugh!!! I don't want to post it. Tell me if you don't know the story and I'll tell you.
February 29DK
I don't remember this. What was it? Sorry for not responding earlier - it's been crazy here. I have to give a talk tomorrow and I just gave one last Sunday so I've just been scrambling trying to pull these talks together and teach at the same time . . .
February 29Carol
It was so funny, and just shows what good kids you were. The bell had rung and I had assigned a project of some kind. I can't remember that detail, but as you guys were in the cloakroom, I was standing in the doorway reminding you of the deadline. For some reason I was trying to say, " I don't want it in bits and pieces". My only excuse was that I was tired when instead I said, " I don't want it in bits and pisses." I quickly corrected myself, but not before seeing the grin on Jason's face! But he didn't say a word. I wonder if he remembers that. Probably not, but I have told it so many times, I've never forgotten. So have you said anything so embarrassing to your students yet?!!
March 3DK
Ha! I don't remember that but thanks for passing it along. I'm sure I've said incredibly embarrassing things to my students but I can't think of an isolated incident. Perhaps they all just blend together.
March 3Carol
Some blend more easily than others. This one was a doozy, but has become a very fond memory. It's scary to think of the slips we don't notice. I don't mind if you want t share it with Jason. oh, I just remember another one! A few years after I taught you, I was teaching Gr. 3 at an inner city school. I was doing math, using an overhead projector. I had a marker in my hand, but tried to indicate the number one, so you can imagine which finger I used!! There was a gasp from some of the boys, but one of them saved me by saying, "It's all right, Miss. It doesn't mean anything unless you mean it, right?"
I'm not sure if she's aware that we teach different students for different reasons and I'm seriously not worried about inadvertently giving my students the finger (advertently, yes) or slipping the word "pisses" into my lecture. I might worry about slipping in a mofo. I have not responded yet because I have no response.
AHA! Monty is sleeping loudly in his dogbed. He has no idea that my awesome day and his shiteous day are going to be one and the same. It is an excellent time to grab him!
Showing posts with label Grade 5 teacher. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Grade 5 teacher. Show all posts
Friday, March 9, 2012
Saturday, December 3, 2011
The first day . . .
And so begins the first day of the rest of my life! The last lecture has been given, the last seminar sat, though of course the term papers are still streaming in alongside an avalanche of doctor's notes and descriptions of melting computers. The movie equivalent of my semester would be this:
That might be a slight exaggeration but also I'm not looking to shake hands with anybody anytime soon. I can tell you the exact week of instruction that I started to drink my own piss, if you want.
Okay, it wasn't that bad but I'm very happy to have it all behind me and am looking forward to pulling my head out of my own ass sometime soon. I will return phonecalls! I will send out Christmas cards (maybe)! I will clean and cook and return emails and update blogs and embrace winter and not grimace every time I see a fb update by my sister about love and harmony and being one with the world. Instead I will wish her well and be proud of her accomplishments. I will be thankful for the weekly emails from my former Grade 5 teacher wherein she gives me advice on how to teach (make sure you have your grading done before you go home each day!, be sure to keep Saturday free so you can do things for yourself!) and tells me about her cross-stitching projects and her love of history and King Arthur.
re: the Gr. 5 teacher. It has gotten to the point in our correspondence where it has become apparent that she is not going away. This means that we should probably have a Coming Out Moment sometime soon and this will either 1) ensure that she DOES go away which might not be a bad thing though it will make me feel crappy if it goes that way or 2) mean that this is some kind of signal to her that we can Talk About It in levels of detail that would be wayyyy TMI if it were a straight person and then we can be BFFs forever (do not want). The third path, the path where it is just another piece of information in a list of other things about me and we can note it and move on seems unlikely in this case though I would like to state for the record that this is my favorite way. If you don't have to expend any mental energy deciding whether or not to talk about your partner with students/colleagues/Grade 5 teachers/highschool fucktards on facebook/etc, then congratulations to you. I'm not quite there yet. I know that this Coming Out isn't necessarily a straight-gay thing and pertains to anyone not in The Usual kind of relationship (ie/ uncontroversially married to someone of similar age, skin color, religion, background, whatever as you) so, it's kind of a widespread phenomenon but again - mental energy, folks. Like an uninsulated window in the winter time, this is a source of mental energy leakage.
Monty's back! In early November, E and I hatched a plan to both drive to Syracuse (she in a rental car w/ Montoya coming up from Balto, me in my trusty Honda from the 'twa), meet at a hotel near the airport within a certain time window, she ditch the rental, we all pile into the Honda to drive back to the 'twa, enjoy US Thanksgiving and E's birthday for a few days, then she fly back to Balto, leaving the Monster to brave the Ottawa winter with me and count the days until E's return for full-on Winter break (she'll be here for almost 6 weeks!). Here's what's amazing: the ridiculously elaborate plan actually worked!!! We both actually arrived in Syracuse at about the same time, after hours and hours of driving; we were NOT stopped at the border to further explain why I had only left Canada for a few hours; Monty's transnational existence continues unquestioned by authorities (mostly, they did ask if he was Canadian, which is an odd question, and we lied and said yes because the truth is too long a story); and everything went off without a hitch!!! It was a thanksgiving miracle.
Montoya seems to be adjusting to his new life in the 'twa very well. Disasters include December 1 when he pulled a bag of flour off the kitchen shelves, ate a bunch of it (really? that's the level of desperation you were at, little dog? have some pride), got thirsty, had a big drink, inadvertently made a flour paste with his paws and snout, and tracked paste-y, floury footprints around my apartment, complete with one perfect dog-print on the foot of my bed like a CSI clip. Then he had a nap. Thankfully he waited until I had put him outside before having the 'rhea all over the backyard. So business as usual with the Monster: he got yelled at and felt bad for a while, but I don't know if he really understands why. I am *determined* not to leave within his sphere of activity the fantastic advent calendar E brought me. Determined! Once everything interesting in the house has been placed above a 2.5 foot height restriction, he and I will lapse into our casual, cozy existence as before.
E will be back in 12 days!!!
That might be a slight exaggeration but also I'm not looking to shake hands with anybody anytime soon. I can tell you the exact week of instruction that I started to drink my own piss, if you want.
Okay, it wasn't that bad but I'm very happy to have it all behind me and am looking forward to pulling my head out of my own ass sometime soon. I will return phonecalls! I will send out Christmas cards (maybe)! I will clean and cook and return emails and update blogs and embrace winter and not grimace every time I see a fb update by my sister about love and harmony and being one with the world. Instead I will wish her well and be proud of her accomplishments. I will be thankful for the weekly emails from my former Grade 5 teacher wherein she gives me advice on how to teach (make sure you have your grading done before you go home each day!, be sure to keep Saturday free so you can do things for yourself!) and tells me about her cross-stitching projects and her love of history and King Arthur.
re: the Gr. 5 teacher. It has gotten to the point in our correspondence where it has become apparent that she is not going away. This means that we should probably have a Coming Out Moment sometime soon and this will either 1) ensure that she DOES go away which might not be a bad thing though it will make me feel crappy if it goes that way or 2) mean that this is some kind of signal to her that we can Talk About It in levels of detail that would be wayyyy TMI if it were a straight person and then we can be BFFs forever (do not want). The third path, the path where it is just another piece of information in a list of other things about me and we can note it and move on seems unlikely in this case though I would like to state for the record that this is my favorite way. If you don't have to expend any mental energy deciding whether or not to talk about your partner with students/colleagues/Grade 5 teachers/highschool fucktards on facebook/etc, then congratulations to you. I'm not quite there yet. I know that this Coming Out isn't necessarily a straight-gay thing and pertains to anyone not in The Usual kind of relationship (ie/ uncontroversially married to someone of similar age, skin color, religion, background, whatever as you) so, it's kind of a widespread phenomenon but again - mental energy, folks. Like an uninsulated window in the winter time, this is a source of mental energy leakage.
Monty's back! In early November, E and I hatched a plan to both drive to Syracuse (she in a rental car w/ Montoya coming up from Balto, me in my trusty Honda from the 'twa), meet at a hotel near the airport within a certain time window, she ditch the rental, we all pile into the Honda to drive back to the 'twa, enjoy US Thanksgiving and E's birthday for a few days, then she fly back to Balto, leaving the Monster to brave the Ottawa winter with me and count the days until E's return for full-on Winter break (she'll be here for almost 6 weeks!). Here's what's amazing: the ridiculously elaborate plan actually worked!!! We both actually arrived in Syracuse at about the same time, after hours and hours of driving; we were NOT stopped at the border to further explain why I had only left Canada for a few hours; Monty's transnational existence continues unquestioned by authorities (mostly, they did ask if he was Canadian, which is an odd question, and we lied and said yes because the truth is too long a story); and everything went off without a hitch!!! It was a thanksgiving miracle.
Montoya seems to be adjusting to his new life in the 'twa very well. Disasters include December 1 when he pulled a bag of flour off the kitchen shelves, ate a bunch of it (really? that's the level of desperation you were at, little dog? have some pride), got thirsty, had a big drink, inadvertently made a flour paste with his paws and snout, and tracked paste-y, floury footprints around my apartment, complete with one perfect dog-print on the foot of my bed like a CSI clip. Then he had a nap. Thankfully he waited until I had put him outside before having the 'rhea all over the backyard. So business as usual with the Monster: he got yelled at and felt bad for a while, but I don't know if he really understands why. I am *determined* not to leave within his sphere of activity the fantastic advent calendar E brought me. Determined! Once everything interesting in the house has been placed above a 2.5 foot height restriction, he and I will lapse into our casual, cozy existence as before.
E will be back in 12 days!!!
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