Did That Just Happen?

Friends, Birthday Week was pretty awesome.  It's hard to recount all the awesome. It's hard to make sense of it all.  What I know for sure is this: today, I am sore all over and have a hangover, there are some pictures on my camera that I don't remember taking, the dog is exhausted, E can barely form sentences, and there's a lot of dirty laundry.

Where to begin? Oh, yes, I know: Wednesday, July 25th, 2012 - the day I went off my diet (or la dieta as we lovingly refer to it).  Before you call the dieta police, I'll say this: between July 25th and July 30th, I ate a lot, I drank *a lot*, but as of weigh-in this morning I am only ONE POUND heavier!!! It's a birthday week miracle! WeightWatchers Online gave me some passive-aggressive bullshit beginning with, "Your weight has increased this week. Are you happy with this result?" but it can suck it because I am *ecstatic* with this result.

Why Wednesday was awesome:

 Stunning salmon dinner cooked by EF.

 

Amazing multi-layer vanilla strawberry whipped-cream cake extravaganza created by none other than MH!!! Was amazing!!! Also, he brought this kind of wine and it is my new favourite, favourite, favourite: http://www.kimcrawfordwines.co.nz.  Drink it.  Do it.

I got a MOFO iRobot Roomba from my parents for my birthday (Note: yes, Wednesday was technically not my birthday but the mail carrier brought my present on Wednesday and that's when I opened it).  Pet Series!!! That's right, suckas, I have a robot vacuum cleaner.  It's a ROBOT.  It does my bidding.  I've named it Rex.  I *love* it.  To head off your first question: no, I will not claim for self vacuuming activity points that Rex gets. Second question: yes, I do know how to vacuum.  Third question: shut up! I don't have to answer your questions.  I own a ROBOT and it vacuums for me.

Rex is so awesome - it looks like he moves in a random fashion but I believe otherwise.  Expect Rex updates to follow.

Why Thursday was awesome:

My actual birthday!!!  So made of awesome, by definition.

It was the one day in virtually this entire summer that it has rained in Ontario.  Seriously, we are having a record drought here, except for on my big day! Other factors working to dampen (heh) birthday spirit: we had to go pick up E's mother in Peterborough to take her to Mississauga for E's brother's wedding on Saturday.  It could have been a disaster.  But instead, awesome.  Here's why:

En route rural Ontario attractions included this stop at the super-creepy abandoned Iron Mine of Marmora (not Moria, but I can see the confusion).  The "lake" is the hole in the ground that used to be the mine and it's filled up with beautiful, unnaturally bright blue, creepy, still water (no giant squid sighted). Rainy ambiance was best for viewing massive pit and there wasn't a soul around for miles.

Next we went to Petroglyphs Provincial Park which is actually a relatively small forest (that day foggy and silent with rain) and is on territory sacred to the Ojibwe people.  There is a massive natural marble slab in the middle of the forest and on it is carved sacred picto-text detailing Algonquin belief, created sometime between AD 900 and 1400.  Groups of young men would be led on pilgrimages to this and other petroglyph sites across North America to bond, mature, and be educated.  It was amazing to visit and I absolutely love the idea of the primacy of religious pilgrimage going on at basically the same time in Europe, the Middle East, and North America:

The site is still used for worship - how cool is that?

Then E (everyday with E is awesome, natch) took me to the Best Restaurant Ever - in nowhere Ontario (who would have thunk it?) and I had birthday gimlet, duck confit, and rack of lamb and was -- remarkably -- too full for dessert.  Fabulous, fabulous birthday.  Totally, totally go to The Riverhouse Co. to eat if you can.

Why the Rest of the Weekend was also Awesome in Unanticipated Ways:

Weddings.  Weddings, weddings, weddings.  Massive E Family time as her little brother tied the knot. I can't go into all the details but suffice it to say that E's parents, now divorced  and her mother remarried, hadn't actually been in the same room together, much less spoken, in a few years (though they both live in Mexico - that's another story).  It was *tense*.  Different camps were devised to create neutral chit-chat territory, different hotels were booked, a rotating chauffeuring regimen was put in place - talk about activity points! Her mother (who is quite a character and enjoys drama) has 2 sisters who are also characters and also enjoy drama and enjoy ramping up the drama on each other - just for something to do.  I have never been so thankful that my mother is an only child. One of her can drive me mental.  E lives in a world where there are 3 of them and their stinging powers increase exponentially when they are in close proximity to one another - like a version of Charmed where everyone is in their 60s (and E's mom can Shannon Doherty-out like nobody's business).

As E and her mother were checking in to the Holiday Inn the front desk clerk did us a "favour" and gave us adjoining rooms.  It was that kind of time.

At the reception, rumours flew that Steve (fake name for E's dad) was "gaunt" and possibly diseased - these rumours were started by Elmira (fake name for E's mom).  Steve struck back, loudly positing that Elmira had had some ill-executed plastic surgery done and declared, "That's not the woman I married!"  We spent many convos quashing both rumours but also secretly wondering about them.

What was truly inspiring and rejuvenating about all of this was that all drama was quickly, quickly drowned out by the perfection of the wedding and the bride and groom's refusal to let other people's bullshit bother them.  The fact that E and I were there together (and I was just meeting many of her relatives for the first time) didn't even register as a talking point (to my ears, anyway).  Everyone was extremely warm and welcoming and both Elmira and Steve were doing their damnedest to outdo the other by being nice to me (which was very fun).  And the bride and groom were/are so perfectly suited to one another, so much in love, and so on top of everything, that it just put the rest of us at ease.  The wedding had the most incredible adult-cool-celebration vibe and it just lifted everyone else up the whole time.

The venue didn't hurt either!  It was held at the bride's family home located on the shore of Lake Ontario and I've seriously never been to a nicer place in my life:

Friends, the above is not a postcard.  It is a snapshot of the bride's lawn. For reals.

 (Yeah, I wore the same thing to MR-C's wedding.  I'll wear this to your wedding too, if you want!)

Monty even put in an appearance towards the midnight mark and shocked and delighted all with his aggressive-aggressive style.

It was a really, really fun wedding!  I feel great!

Now - to recover from the hangover.  And find a way to watch the opening ceremonies of those Olympics that I've been hearing so much about!