Word appreciation

Fucktard is such an awesome word, especially when one is describing certain students. Fucker usually isn't applicable because it confers a certain kind of malicious agency to the fucker which more often than not is not there. They're not *trying* to screw up your day (I think). Fucked-up and Fuck Up are ultimately unsatisfying because they imply that the person is either high or suffering from a bad case of typecasting which makes it seem like their problems are environmental. Fucked is good because it carries with it the idea that the person is beyond help (ie/ they are fucked) but you can't really use it as a noun or at least not in an elegant, conversational way. I like how the first syllable of fucktard preserves an association with the fuck- genus of descriptors without specifying which one. Thus, fucktards can be malicious fuckers but they can also just be fucked - it depends on the context.

Turning to my appreciation of the 'tard syllable, we all know that retard can't be used anymore because it implies that you think the person has some kind of mental or physical condition like Down's Syndrome which is wholly unfair to people with these conditions. On the other hand, I'd really like to recover the non-medical-specific use of the term which not only intones that a person is slow but that that person actually acts as a pull (retardant) on everything else. Thus, by being a retard the person in question is dragging us all down. Again, when applied to people with severe physical and/or mental conditions this is a horrible, awful perspective to support (thanks 20c science for your shithead usage of that word, YOU are to blame). When applied to certain people (I'm currently thinking of 7 examples - I'd make a dwarf comment but that's a whole other topic of nomenclature that I'll save for another day) in certain situations (ie/ my day), it makes perfect sense to use the word retard, though politically incorrect. I enjoy how, by truncating the word to "tard", we signal that we are aware the usage of full-on "retard" is no longer viable but that we wish to retain the judgment-laden meaning of slowness and dragging down, discarding medical-condition specificity in the process.

For the reasons above, the conjoining of fuck- and -tard into fucktard creates a wonderfully flexible and meaningful descriptor for the fucktards who animate my day. Of course, there are typologies within the "fucktard" rubric but I will save that discussion for another day. I can only split so many hairs per day and I must pace myself because it is still the morning.